Please, Pull my Curl One More Time
If you’re someone who is also so blessed to have curly hair, you can likely predict what I’m about to say without me having to say it based on the mere title alone.
That because our luscious curls seem to have a uniquely embedded magnetizing mechanism unparalleled to any other hair of sort that draws fingers directly to our head.
It’s as though our curls hold signs saying “Yes, please we want to be fondled and stretched out only to immediately be left limp and frizzy, and maybe dirty if you forgot to wash your hands.”
On a more serious note, this is a real occurrence. Growing up my friends for some reason always wanted to touch my hair. And not just graze it gently and be gone, they went so far as to borderline molest my scalp, caress every stand and investigate it for all it was worth. Gold. That’s what my locks are worth. I’m kidding. Kind of.
Oh The Times
I would walk onto the school ground, smiling, likely eating toast or Fruit Loops from a crusted plastic sandwich baggie I quickly grabbed and deemed ‘breakfast,’ and within a minute could be seen being hair-fondled.
I had gotten used to it by that point, because, well, it happened so often. Now, looking back, these occurrences also left me feeling very abnormal. Because I felt like this, I began straightening my hair e v e r y single day.
I started really looking at my hair like, “dang, these curls are really different.” I regarded it as a bad thing. To my greatest misfortune because all that straightening added up and caused me to have to chop all of it off. It also caused me to relapse into old sentiments of feeling insecure–but that’s a story for another day.
What I’m aiming to draw your attention to is the amount of worth we place on appearance. My hair seemed to always captivate people. It was the first thing they noticed and always remembered me by. It made me feel it was my only beautiful quality. It’s likely the reason I kept my hair short for years to follow (besides the fact that it was dead from excessive heat).
Why as a society do we care so much about physical aesthetics? It’s redundant rhetoric. We talk about the issue all the time, and corporations capitalize on feeding into these sentiments via campaigns, advertisements, subtle (but not so subtle) blogs, stories and social marketing videos; yet the ‘issue’ remains.
There are little girls with my similar features who likely experience the same thing on a regular basis. And women every day are made to feel lesser if we can’t reach or attain the standards as outlined but US–because WE are society.
Don’t get me wrong, hair is beautiful. People are beautiful. But ALL people are beautiful. And beyond that, we all carry deeper substance that is often overlooked and forgotten within social settings if we’re not the stand out broad or jock in the room.
We’re obsessed with image. We’re obsessed with fame, money, power, pride, sex, beauty, thrill, status, etc. There’s a need for balance. I stress the need for an equilibrium between image and substance. An equal balance that doesn’t ever underpin someone’s value based on the fact that their hair isn’t as intriguing, or that they’re not as elite as the next person.
I don’t know if we’ll ever be able to reach this as a society, especially seeing as we are in the brink and break of the digital era, but we can try. We can aim to actually greet people equally, praise people for the goodness of their heart, and love them for simply being what we are–human beings. Let’s just be, man.